My matrimony profile

We all grow and evolve with time. I have outgrown who I was five years ago. And most of what I had written back then doesn't resonate with who I am today. At this moment, this is what feels safe for me:

1. Being treated with basic human level respect that each one of us deserves, without strangling and suffocating each other in the name of love, affection and care.

2. Life is like a sine wave taking us through its own ups and downs. No one can escape it by purchasing VIP passes. When my wave takes me down,  I don't expect you to throw everything away and jump in to rescue me. Can you stand by me steadily as I deal with my sine wave called life? Most importantly would you be able to not throw any garbage at me especially when I'm dealing with my lows? Your circus and your monkeys are your responsibility to deal with.

3. And when the sine wave naturally progresses upwards, do you have the capacity to genuinely feel happy for me without drowning into your insecurities? I might forget to celebrate my small wins now and then. Would you remind me to celebrate them and be a part of my celebration when it happens?

I'll try my best to keep my circus and my monkeys under check so that I don't unknowingly throw my garbage at you. I am a human too. Whenever my thoughts, words and actions feel disrespectful to you, please bring it up for a conversation. I will make an effort to understand you deeper and course correct wherever needed. Without a question, I'll stand by you regardless of what life may throw at you as long as you are honest with yourself without unnecessarily distracting yourself with useless things. I'll be your biggest cheerleader for every small and big win that life gifts you with :)

With respect & love,

Vanathi 

P.S.: What's written below is not relevant as of today. It's intentionally greyed out.

Matrimony Profile

Believe me. Updating a matrimony profile is far difficult than updating a resume for a job interview. 

The one where you want to pour your heart out, express your authentic self, and want your profile to be a sign for your soul mate to freeze for a moment and to choose to connect to you - This version of matrimony profile makes it look like the odd one out where even the matrimony site owners might ask you to take off your description from their site. 

And the default version of the matrimony profile your parent writes on your behalf might make your soul mate run as far away from your profile as he/she can.

How I want my matrimony profile to look like?

To tell something about myself,

I am an avid reader. I feel I have found myself after getting lost into the words of legends like Kalki, Jayakanthan, Na. Parthasarathy, Dan Brown, Paulo Coelho,.............

I love being in nature. Be it a walk in the park, or a leisurely evening by the beach or finding patterns in the clouds or feeling energized by the sun's rays or feeling calm and peaceful in the moonlight.

I wouldn't call myself a writer yet. Occasionally, there are times when something impacts me very deeply and my hand starts scribbling things onto a paper.

My solo travels bring about memories of the anxiety before starting for the trip -> how effortlessly I was able to enjoy the journey throughout -> the friends I am still in touch with. Traveling has been an amazing experience.

I am FiNe. MBTI enthusiasts would know me as INFP :)

And, I am a Software Engineer by profession. I work in Bangalore. During my school days, being an expert procrastinator, I typically cram for an exam just on the previous day. Somehow I ended up being school topper in 10th and 12th exams which still makes me wonder how it all happened.

My first marriage ended up in a divorce due to compatibility issues. Though it took me a while to process all the tough emotions, it taught me who I am as a person. It also gave me the understanding that one can be strong and at the same time it's ok to surrender to the way life turns out.

A matrimony profile may not be able to do enough justice to express who Vanathi is as a person in reality.

And when it comes to my expectations from a partner,

I am looking for a person with whom I can experience life to its fullest, someone with whom I can laugh at the silliest of things, someone who takes life seriously, someone who is accountable for his own emotions and decisions.

Being an introvert, I need space for myself at times. I want my partner to be secure enough to be there for me while allowing me my space.

Though I am a foodie and I love cooking, I don't mind getting a helping hand in doing household chores :)

You are signing up to be with a hopeless optimist. If you are willing to do a little bit of fine-tuning and tinkering on my laziness and procrastination, we both can create our own fairytale world that's built firmly on the foundation of seemingly harsh ground reality !!

To be honest, I don't know what I could contribute to this relationship. Let me think about it...

As I like exploring a lot about human emotions and triggers, you have an unpaid therapist at home to soothe you anytime you feel even slightly off.

A weirdo who wouldn't hesitate a moment to reassure you that you are the best person in the world and stand by you all the time despite whatever life may throw at you.

At times, I can be a self-righteous irritating person who would gently nudge you toward becoming a better version of yourself.

At this moment, my parents are my world. We can take care of our worlds together :) Having said that, please remember - I need my space too.

How my dad has created it on my behalf?

A few words about my daughter

I am creating this profile on behalf of my daughter. She is currently working in the private sector as a software professional, after having completed her master's degree. We come from an upper-middle-class family with moderate family values. We belong to a nuclear family currently she is working in Bangalore, family living in Chennai.